Saying Goodbye To China..

Six months ago, Pastor Mar on his preaching told us to declare something that we really want to happen in our life. So I did and declared and claimed that I will work abroad in the mighty name of Jesus. The next day Bessie called me for the offer. I accepted it but I am still consulting the Lord if He really wants me to be here. I finally decided to go when I got the confirmation that I need to be in China. My 5 month stay here in China wasn’t that easy. I’ve been into lots of trials, emotional tortures, heart aches, troubles, loneliness, tests, frustrations, desperations, and all kind of pain you could feel. However, it was an excellent experience that I did not indeed regret. I’ve learned a lot from my experiences. I became closer to the Lord. I’ve loved my family more and more and became closer to them though we are literally/physically apart. I’ve learned to appreciate and love my friends more specially my best friends. I know that I will never find someone like Daneth, Sheng, Auh, Sharon, and Jhay as well as my AOL friends. Because I know no body could ever care for me than them, my family and the Lord. I’ve loved my father more and more though I am missing him and shed tears for him every night. I’ve realized how blessed I am for having such a powerful and loving God, an amazing family, and wonderful friends. The Lord never ceased working on my life and moving me. I may had tough times here and been into lots of pain but I am still grateful for my Lord never forsaken me. The God who brought me here will be the same God who will send and get me home safely. He continued on pruning me, teaching me, loving me, and forgiving me. This was the first time that I had an intimate relationship with the Lord. I never thought that I will feel Him, experience Him in my life in a way I didn’t expect. I couldn’t describe His love for me but it was perfect and unconditional. I just wish that I had this before but He’s been really kind for He gave me another chance. My life started to have a direction like I never had before. He’d been guiding me and stay with me all the time though I don’t listen sometimes and insist my will. Through all the tormenting moments I had, my Lord stayed with me. He’d been my comforter, my Father, my Savior, and my provider. I never told Him that I love Him more than the air that I breathe but I’ve said that to a guy. And now, I know and keep telling Him that I love Him more than anything in this world, more than my life. He fixed my chaos life and I owe Him everything I have. I will do my best to fulfill what I promised Him. I want to serve Him for the rest of my life. Wherever He will take me after going out of China, I will continue to serve Him and win more souls for Him. I will run the race till I will see Him personally. Sometimes, I am failing Him but He’s always reminding me and showing me His great love. I would never ever forget China for this is where I had the most painful yet wonderful experience in my life.

I would like to thank Gennaro for being a responsible, funny, loving, and kind supervisor. Senior Gianni, who’d been there always to help us and support us. Miss Karen, who’d been there for us and praying for us always. She was one of my inspirations on my ministry. She is a great servant and her experiences and teachings are moving me. Bessie, for helping me all the time. For her stories that made me laugh, her support and encouragements. I thank her for all the things she gave me. I’ll miss giggling with her and how we run and the excitement we feel whenever we see foreigners. We are like fools tripping foreigners. The laughters we had because she make fun of me because of my craziness like carrying grocery bags on my chest because it was too heavy and lot of things. Rodel, who’d been really helpful and supportive too. A great cook and concern brother. I thank him for being kind and sweet and for taking good care of us. For sharing what he has. For making me laugh always. Romel, who’s been really crazy but really kind. For watching over me while I am sleeping whenever we go in Hong Kong, for bringing my things. Though I am losing my patience because of his naughtiness, his endless non-sense stories, I am still grateful for knowing him. Though he is pissing me off most of the time, and serve as one of my trials in life, I am happy because he’d been really kind to me, he’s always there to listen for all my complains, my dreams in life and all. He cooks when I am not feeling well. Amy, for being such a good Chinese friend. I thank her for ordering food for me (because I can’t speak Chinese), for being my interpreter, for being there always whenever I need her. I will miss eating lunch with her and laughing while we are eating. Sally, for being a good secretary. Who keep on helping us for all the things we need in the office. Who never complained whenever we asked her a favor. Tammy, for being such a friendly and beautiful Hong Kong secretary. I thank her for all the help she’s giving, support and guidance whenever we go in Hong Kong office. Chowi, for making me laugh always and for making my day. She is our helper in the office. She loves talking to me though we don’t understand each other. Amy is my interpreter. Chowi treats me like her daughter. She is styling my hair, wiping my hands with tissue everytime we see each other in comfort room. I really love teasing her and giving her things. She always refused the money I am giving her so I am sharing her my food instead and she loves it and never stop thanking me. I will miss her really. My other Chinese co-employees, that make me laugh everytime we eat lunch. Suki, was really funny. Everytime I laugh she’s telling me not to laugh at her haha. I said, she must be proud because not all people can make me really happy. I am waiting for her to finish one time we ate lunch together she said I have good manners. Her English was really funny. Whenever I talk to her she keep on asking me to repeat it she’s always telling she is slow on listening English. She is really funny but indeed with a good heart. Very appreciative, always telling me I am lovely. Wow! You know what makes her really funny? She fell from her chair twice this month and we all ended up laughing but she never get mad but laugh with us and start talking so fast in English that you wouldn’t understand. Jacqueline, very appreciative too. She always notice my cheeks, telling me she likes them because they are rosy. She is very beautiful. I like her face really not typical Chinese girl. I also love talking to her, very good English accent and really friendly. She’s sharing her food to me too. Leena, very beautiful Chinese woman but when she talks oh my goodness her voice sounds like a man’s voice but she is very kind too. Michael, wwwooo! He looks like Jackie Chan. I love his face really cute hehe. He invited us just last week for a dinner to celebrate because he just got married. When we arrived at the resto, his wife wasn’t there yet. I am telling Romel, I can be his bride even just for tonight. Crazy me! Elle, for being such a sweet and funny friend. I’ll surely miss this girl. She’d been there for me always. She always listen to all my dramas in life specially when I am telling stories about a friend that I love so much. I’m gonna miss sleeping over her place. I miss the food she’s bringing whenever she is visiting us. I’ll miss eating at McDonalds with her, bowling with her, watching movies with her. I’ll miss her jokes and stories and of course our friendship. And lastly, my Ate Cecile. She’d been a great sister to me, adviser, listener and all. I’m gonna miss her so much. I’ll miss our chit-chat, laughing till midnight, movies we used to watch, TV series that we love watching specially The O.C., the food that we both love, sneaking out to buy chocolates, and the fruits. I’ll miss removing the tiny white particles from her scalp, removing her dead and white hair, giving her massage till she sleeps and her sweet and funny voice when she’s asking me for a massage. Her complains and stories about her boss’ wife. How she reacts when Romel and I tease her. How happy she is when the food we are eating was good. Her reaction every time I treat her and ask her what she wants to eat. I keep on telling her that when I ask her what she wants to eat that means I’ll treat her and she is really shy so I have to force her hehe. I really love her so much that is why I am taking good care of her as my own sister. I’ll miss going out with her and all the things that we shared that I will never ever forget. Her cuddles and gazes. She’s always staring at me and when I ask her why she always say “because you are so cute”. Then I’ll ask, are you pregnant? We ended up laughing all the time. I’ll miss how I drive her really crazy and make her laugh whenever I am losing my sanity because of a guy. I’m sure I’ll cry when we depart. She is the main reason why I enjoyed my stay here despite of all my problems.

What else will I miss? Oh of course I’m gonna miss watching my favorite TV series. I’ll miss The O.C. (My all time favorite. I will never see Ryan, Seth, Summer, Marrisa, and Mr. and Mrs. Sandy Cohen again. That makes me really sad. I am addicted to this show), Medium, Life As We Know It, CSI Miami, CSI New York, CSI Florida, Point Pleasant, Without A Trace, Alias, David Rocco’s Dolce Vita (David is my crush. He is an Italian and his smile and his eyes drives me really crazy), Cold Case, 10.5, and more. Oh Seth my American friend. I promised him a date when he’ll be back but when that time comes, I am out of here. It’s really funny how we met Seth. Bessie, Rodel, Romel, and I were on our way to the grocery store to buy something we can cook for dinner. Rodel came in first and told us to wait for him at the lobby. Then Romel and Bessie came in and saw Seth. They were amazed because he can speak Mandarin fluently. I did not notice him but when he came out, he is staring at me. I wonder why, then he looked at me again while he is walking away. Then looked back again then I said Yes? He came back immediately and approached us. Then he asked from what country we came from. Bessie said Philippines, he answered yeah I know that you are not Chinese the moment that I saw her (looking at me) I know she’s not. We talked and he asked for a calling card and gave us his. We started e-mailing and chatting from then on. He asked me for a date when he will go back in Foshan because he is on Shanghai. I said yes but I have to bring along my friends. He is really funny and gentle. And of course I’m gonna miss Ashay. He is really funny and naughty but really sweet and gentle kid. I will miss treating him at McDonalds and playing badminton and bowling with him. I will Daniel. He is Ashay’s friend from Brisbane Australia. We chat everyday and I enjoy it though he is only 12. I will surely miss his messages that makes me laugh. He is also a smart kid like Ashay. He is so cute and I’ve asked him once if he has older brother but sorry to say he has none haha.

Despite of all the heart aches, I have learned a lot from here. Other than loving my family and friends more, I met a lot of friends. I became closer to the Lord and my relationship with Him is growing which is the greatest. I cook before but I’ve learned lots of menu from Chinese, Filipino, Australian, and Italian. I am now eating green leafy vegetables and I know I’m gonna make my mama proud of that because she used to forced me to eat vegetables now she will be surprised for sure when I get home. I discovered Christianster through Bessie and I met lots of Christian friends here. I met and became closer to Francis and Patrick who’d been there for me always when I need someone I could talk to. I remember last time that I was really down and I am crying here at office and thank God they were there to comfort me and best friend Daneth of course. Francis was really sweet and even asked me if he could fetch me at the airport but I refused to because my sister will do. Patrick who’d been a brother to me was always there whenever I feel like crying. I will meet them when I get back and I am so excited. Then there was Rizza. I never heard from her from a long time. She was one of my best buddies in high school and I am glad we were able to catch up with each other. And I am so blessed because she is also a Christian now. I am also able to catch up with my high school friends specially Mitch. We belong in one group in high school and Rizza too. Mitch and I were both on dance group called Hi-Tech Movers. I am also excited to meet her again and we are planning to go out when I get back. I found so much time to update my blog and share my experiences and share the gospel through it and through e-mail and chat. What I can learn and share about the Lord is more important to me than any other things in this world. When you die, He will not ask you what programs you know. I thank the Lord for giving me a chance to be part of Praise and Worship and a chance to lead it and preach which I always dream of. Daneth and I were able to catch up, love, and appreciated each other more. I am able to share her my experiences and share her my ministry. And she is there to comfort me always and help me in any way she can.

I will never ever forget China because I’ve been a strong a woman here. So where will I be after China? Staying good in the Philippines, Japan, Australia, Canada, back in China? Who knows only God knows. Wherever He will take me I know that is what best for me and that is His plan for me. He will open another door for me that is for sure. I’ll wait and see then obey.

So Excited To Go Home...

Finally I’m going home on December 19. I almost gave up because I am supposed to go on December 18 but the only available flight to Manila was fully-booked and I was late on booking a ticket. Then I tried so many times calling Philippine Airlines just to take other flights from Hong Kong to Manila because Shenzen’s flights were all canceled from December 10 to December 30. Air Philippines flight from Guangzhou is only available every Sunday and 18 was full the next flight is on December 25 8pm and arrives at 10pm and I couldn’t take that because I wanna be home for Christmas and be with my family on Christmas Eve. My sister and I were planning to spend it at Cainta or Baguio so that we are complete because my brother, Koya Albert couldn’t go home in Pampanga because we don’t want to risk his life. Every time I think of him, my eyes were filled with tears. He wants to be with his children but he couldn’t because there are people who are evil wanting to kill him. I’m been praying for him always. So we decided to go out of town for Christmas because being with your family on Christ’s Day is one of the best thing in this world, the happiest moment of your life.

I’ve talked to lots of people to help me book a ticket for me. Then finally I talked to Hong Kong’s secretary and she managed to book me on the same day. Now the problem is, they want me to pay the ticket. They want to deduct the payment from my salary which is unfair because I am entitled for free ticket yearly. Thank God my supervisor Gennaro was there to help me. I really admire this person for having the courage. He called the owner of the company and fight for it. Then at the same day, they decided to shoulder the ticket and got my e-ticket right away. Look what the Lord has done? I almost gave up, then finally surrendered Him the situation and let it go. I told Him to handle it for me. I offered the situation to Him and asked Him to manage it for I cannot do anything about it. He’d been really good to me. And I know He will also work for my salary for getting it in advance. Praise God for being so faithful and loving.

My things were all packed and I am ready to fly. I am so excited to go home and I couldn’t sleep last night because of the excitement and joy that I am feeling. I am thinking what would I do when I get home. Here are my plans upon arriving:

1. Eat balot (duck’s egg). I really miss that so much. That will be the first Pinoy food that I want to eat. I remember Daneth when she came home in the Philippines after a year and we will visit our friend Bing. We bought some barbeque and balot. We are supposed to eat them at Bing’s place but Daneth was so excited so she ate one on the street while we are waiting for the barbeque. She made me laugh so much that time and now I know how it feels to be away from home.
   
2. I will probably stay at my sister’s place in Cainta till Christmas because I need to fix some papers and documents.
   
3. Talk to my family for our Christmas plan.
   
4. See some Christian friends that I met online.
   
5. After Christmas, set dates for my friends in Pampanga including my high school and college friends.
   
6. Be busy and active on my ministry and service on Jesus Our Victory church and see my friends. I am so excited to see and be with the youth again. I really miss these guys so much.
   
7. When I see my family I will give them all the tightest hug and sweetest kiss I could give. Then stay at home as much as I can to spend more time with my family. Oh I can’t wait to be with them. Missing them everyday of my life. Wondering how my babies look like now. How tall they are now.
   
8. Ask my mom to help me buy galonggong. I really miss that fish. You can’t find it here in China. That is my favorite fish and my favorite food. My mom is always laughing at me every time she cooks that. I am eating 2 big pieces with rice and 1 big piece bonus.
   
9. Cook for my family and let them try my specialties. And also ask my mom to buy vegetables. I know she will be surprised because what she knew is I hate veges but not anymore. I’ve learned to eat almost all kind of vegetables here on China. She will be proud of me and be very happy for sure.
   
10. Buy Christian books like Boy Meets Girl, Heaven Is So Real, and buy another Bible, New International Version.

Every time I think of going home, my heart is singing. I am always singing and dancing because of joy. I feel like I am a teenager who’s in love. I am dancing and singing on bus stop and Chinese people were all staring at me. What can I do, I am so happy and I can’t hide it. I really thank the Lord for making things possible. He is really powerful. I love Him so much and I will thank Him forever.

LoVe Is..

Love is like waiting for a bus. When the bus
comes, you look at it and you say to yourself
"eeee...so full....cannot sit down, I'll wait for the
next one."

So you let the bus go and waited for the second
bus. Then the second bus came, you looked at it
you said, "eeee...this bus is so old...so shabby!"
So you let the bus go and again, decided to wait
for the next bus.

After a while another bus came, it's not crowded,
not old but you said, "eeee...not air conditioned
...better wait for the next one." So again you
let the bus go and decided to wait for the next
bus.

Then the sky started to get dark as it was
getting late. You panicked and jumped immediately
inside the next bus. It is not until much later that
you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus!
And you wasted your time and money just to get
into the wrong one!

Even if an air conditioned bus comes, you can't
ensure that the air conditioned bus won't break
down or whether or not the airconditioner will
be too cold for you.

Wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it
wouldn't hurt to give other people a chance. If
you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you just
press the red button and get off the bus! Hey, who
said life is fair The best thing to do is be
observant and open-minded. If it doesn't suit you,
get off.

I'm sure you've had this experience before. You
saw a bus coming (the bus you want of course). You
flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not
see you and zoomed pass you! It just wasn't meant
for you!

The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting
for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and
appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends
totally on you. If you haven't made any choice, WALK!

Walking is like being single. The good side of it
is you can still choose any bus you want...the
rest who couldn't afford another ride would just
have to be content with the bus they rode on, ugly
or not.

Also, sometimes it is better to choose a bus you
are already familiar with rather than to gamble
with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then
again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks
involved.

But there is one bus that I failed to tell you
about.- the Bus you do not have to wait for, the
Bus that will stop on its own and ask you if you
wish to come inside, then take you for a joy ride
for the rest of your life.

Hope you get to ride on that bus!
God said: "Build a better world." I said:"How? The
world is such
complicated, cold, dark place and there is nothing I can do."
But God said: "Just build a better you."

One Piece

One piece is one of my favorite anime series. I am an anime addict. I am funny and crazy I know and I admit that. What I am watching was not just a simple anime. If you try to watch it closely and understand the story, you will find it's really great and touching. There are moral lessons you can get out of it. One Piece was great because of their friendship. They are willing to die to save and protect each other and the ones who need help. I remember my last team on AOL before I left, my coach was being reminded to watch over us because one coach caught one our team reading comic strip. It was my fault because I shared the One Piece’s comic strip to Jei and Noze. I was so guilty about it. We’ve been reading it everyday because GMA stopped airing it and I want to finish the story so I got the site from One Piece lover in the board. I am still reading it, I am currently on chapter 391 and still waiting for 392 to be posted. The recent chapters made me cried because Robin is sacrificing her life just for her friends to be saved. But Luffy and the gang followed her to save her. Robin does not want her friends to die so she surrendered herself to the government so that Straw Hat Luffy gang will be pardoned in return. She is touching and a great friend. In the other hand, Luffy, Nami, Zoro, Chopper, Sanji, and Usop were also ready to die to save Robin and get her back to the crew. I love watching it and reading the strip. I am really fascinated with it. It’s full of actions, really funny, and touching. And not to mention the dubbing of GMA 7 was great. I cried one time because I missed one episode. My mom did not wake me up and I was so sad and I cried. My mom was laughing at me and my sister. Yeah I know I am insane but what can I do? I love it and I am addicted to it. When GMA stopped airing Striker I was really mad and even get mad when One Piece was stopped. Those are my craziest moments in life.

One Piece Opening and Closing Songs

Pictures:

Monkey D' Luffy

Messages From God Through Miss Karen

Miss Karen is an Australian missionary. She is our leader in fellowship here in China. She’d been staying here at China for 3 years. When God sent her in China, at first she can’t believe it and asked God if He really wants her to be here. She is an intercessor. She had a gift of seeing messages upon seeing a person’s face. Last night was our last fellowship with her because she will fly to Japan and stay there for 6 months to 1 year. She made cards for us and wrote messages on it. She said while she is praying for each and every one of us those are the messages that God wants to send us. Those are revelations from God.

Before she began the preaching right after the praise and worship, she told me that every time she is seeing me on praise and worship, she is seeing “Be Bold” on me. She repeated it “Aby Be Bold”, “Aby Be Bold”, she said she kept on seeing that during our praise and worship. I didn’t ask what it means because we are in the middle of fellowship. After the preaching, she said there are two among us have calling from the Lord. She looked at Ate Cecile and said “The other one was definitely you. But I don’t want to reveal the other one because it might scared her off.”

Then she started giving out the cards and reading them out loud. I am shaking and praying for strength while waiting for my turn. I said to the Lord to help me accept and do whatever Your message for me. While reading the messages, she is crying then she said “I am crying not because of grief. It is actually cleansing”, she looked at me and said, “You have it. It is cleansing from the Lord.” I was surprised because she had so much to say to me. She is always seeing me crying every Praise and Worship that is why she told me that. She is right, you are crying not because you are sad or you have problems. You are crying because you are feeling His presence and His love. As what Jhay told me, “Crying is not a sign of weakness but of courage to face the fact that you’re nothing without God’s grace and mercy.” And told me that I am not alone because even him is crying on Praise and Worship. I was so blessed and happy to hear that from him. It was really amazing and uplifting knowing a guy is crying because of God’s grace, love and mercy. There are probably 2% of man's population who's like that.

My turn came. I was the last one, before reading the card, she said there are lots of prayers and revelations for me. Then she read:

“Abby God has you on His operating table healing and restoring you emotionally and strengthening you as He prepares you for what is to come. Take this opportunity to trust in Him and open your heart to Him. Allow Him to refine you as pure gold. Remember He is the potter you are the clay. Allow Him to mould (mold) you and shape you into a willing vessel for Him.

Keep your eyes on Him and your heart filled to overflowing with His word, for His word is wisdom and strength, your life support.

Romans 12:2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

Abby know He will direct your path, do not turn this way or that way walk a straight path and stay in His peace. He knows your heart more than you know yourself and He loves you just the way you are. But even better He loves you so much He wants you to be whole. Abide in Him and He will abide in you.”

When we got home, while Ate Cecile and I were cooking, we talked about the messages. Then I asked her, Miss Karen was saying about two among us. What was that? I didn’t hear it clearly. Ate Cecile said it was a calling from God then she told me I might be the other one because God is refining me and I am on His operating table. Then I said oh no. That is what you like right, she asked. I said yes, I want to be on a mission but not right now because I still need to support my family probably when I'm stable. Then she told me about the “Be Bold” thing. I almost forget about it, Ate Cecile reminded me about it. Oh yeah I said, I don’t understand what was that. What does it mean I asked. Probably be strong and courageous she said.

It’s bed time. After shower, I sat on my bed and read the card Miss Karen gave me again. I meditated on the messages written on it. I read it 4 times and this message made me cried “He knows your heart more than you know yourself and He loves you just the way you are.” No one ever told he/she loves me just the way I am. I was so happy to hear that from the Lord. I only got that from Him and I was overwhelmed and my heart burst with happiness. I thank the Lord for His unfailing and unconditional love He’s giving me. “Abby God has you on His operating table healing and restoring you emotionally and strengthening you as He prepares you for what is to come.” I keep on thinking about this. I am asking what is to come and why should I be prepared? I asked “Lord will you take away my mom from me?” Then I cried and said, I hope it’s not that oh Lord. I can’t afford to lose my mom. Give us more time together probably 10-20 more years Lord. But I discerned that it wasn’t it. Till now I am thinking what would it be. Whatever it will be, I know that the Lord will be there for me so I am ready for it. After reading it 4 times, I closed my eyes and prayed. I asked the Lord to help me and strengthen me while He is preparing, shaping me for whatever He wants me to be. I raised my right hand and ask the Lord to reach for it and never let go of it no matter what happens. My eyes were filled with tears and I am so happy for His messages thinking that I was special because He had a plan for me. This is what I want. I want Him to use me as His messenger and servant. Praise God. He is a loving and forgiving God.

After praying as my daily devotion, I read my book “Devotions For A Deeper Life” and here is what I’ve read:

November 28

SUGGESTED READING: 1 TIMOTHY 4:1-9

But refuse profane and old wives’ fables, and exercise thyself rather unto godliness (1 Timothy 4:7)

You cannot predict how God may operate. Many dear souls are living specimens of what God has done and how the Spirit of God has worked, even though you may not fully understand them nor their methods. Many times some poor, ignorant servant, who seems to scarcely know how to put anything together, is mighty used of God in the salvation of souls – while others, who have a clear understanding of the gospel, explain the way of salvation ever so clearly, yet nothing happens.

This illustrates once again that a right relationship with God is more important that right teaching about God.

Ask yourself, Do I experimentally know what full salvation is? Do I know what entire sanctification means, in my own experience? The worker for God must be in healthy, vigorous spiritual condition himself. Are you?

Prayer Thought: O God, work out Your will in my life as You desire. Your ways are above my ways.

The message is almost the same from what Miss Karen gave me. Upon lying down, I kept on thinking about the messages and the message “Be Bold”. Asking the Lord what does He mean. What does He referring to. And kept on saying “Be Bold” “Be Bold” “Be Bold”, what does it really mean till my eyes closed and slept. I am still digging on the messages but I know the Lord will reveal them soon to me. Whatever they are, knowing that the Lord is with me there is nothing I should fear about. All I know is that I am happy because the Lord loves me so much and He has a plan for me. Let’s wait and see what is that plan.

All He Had To Offer

Saturday is a boring day at work for me but the Lord keeps on waking me up to get here in our office. I have no work to do today so I checked my mails and www.christianster.com. That site is similar to friendster but it is for Christians. I am checking it everyday. I ran through the sharing section to read some stories then this one makes me interested. I go on and opened it then read it. The last part of the story made my tears fell. I’m still crying up to this time. I really can’t stop the tears from falling. Romel asked me if I am crying, I said the story that I read made me cried. The story touched me so much and moved me. It is such an amazing story, heart-warming and soul-soothing. Please check it out and read it slowly and meditate on it.

The Story:

Here is a story, reported to be true, about a nine-year-old boy who lived in a rural town in Tennessee.

His house was in a poor area of the community. A church there had a bus Ministry that came knocking on his door one Saturday afternoon. The child came to answer the door and greeted the bus Pastor. The bus Pastor asked if his parents were home and the small boy told him that his parents take off every weekend and leave him at home to take care of his little brother.

The bus Pastor could not believe what the child said and asked him to repeat it. The youngster gave the same answer and the bus Pastor asked to come in and talk with him. They went into the living room and sat down on an old couch with the foam and springs exposed. The bus Pastor asked the child, "Where do you go to church?" The young boy surprised the visitor by replying, "I've never been to church in my whole life." The bus Pastor thought to himself about the fact that his church was less than three miles from the child's house.

"Are you sure you have never been to church?" he asked again. "I'm sure I haven't, " came his answer. Then the bus Pastor said, "Well, son, more important than going to church, have you ever heard the greatest love story ever told?" and then he proceeded to share the Gospel with this little nine-year-old boy.

The young lad's heart began to be tenderized and at the end of the bus pastor's story, the bus Pastor asked if the boy wanted to receive this free gift from God. The youngster exclaimed, "OF COURSE!" The child and the bus Pastor got on their knees and the lad invited Jesus into his little heart and received the free gift of salvation.

They both stood up and the bus Pastor asked if he could pick the child up for church the next morning. "Sure," the nine year old replied. The bus Pastor got to the house early the next morning and found the lights off. He let himself in, snaked his way through the house, and found the little boy asleep in his bed. He woke up the little boy and his brother and helped get them dressed. They got on the bus and ate a doughnut for breakfast on their way to church.

Keep in mind that this boy had never been to church before. The church was a real big one. The little child just sat there, clueless of what was going on. A few minutes into the service, these tall unhappy guys walked down to the front and picked up some wooden plates. One of the men prayed and the child, with utter fascination, watched them walk up and down the aisles. He still did not know what was going on. Suddenly, like a bolt of lightning, it hit the child what was taking place.

These people must be giving money to Jesus. He then reflected on the free gift of life he had received just twenty-four hours earlier. He immediately searched his pockets, front and back, and could not find a thing to give Jesus. By this time the offering plate was being passed down his aisle and, with a broken heart, he just grabbed the plate and held on to it. He finally let go and watched it pass on down the aisle. He turned around to see it passed down the aisle behind him. And then his eyes remained glued on the plate as it was passed back and forth, back and forth all the way to the rear of the sanctuary.

Then he had an idea. This little nine-year-old boy, in front of God and everybody, got up out of his seat. He walked about eight rows back, grabbed the usher by the coat, and asked to hold the plate one more time. Then he did the most astounding thing I have ever heard of. He took the plate, sat it on the carpeted church floor, and stepped into the center of it. As he stood there, he lifted his little head up and said, "Jesus, I don't have anything to give you today, but just me. I give you me!"

My Response:

I am giving my tithe to the Lord. I am sending it to the Philippines and asking my mom to give it for me in our church but I know that wasn’t enough for all the things the Lord gave me. And this little boy just offered his life because he has nothing to give to the Lord. Money is not the answer, it is not all what you could offer. You cannot repay love by giving money. Love is the answer. As what I am always telling, “Love is what makes life worth while.” Simple act of kindness, compassion, forgiveness, charity is what we could give is this world. Jesus is all we need. We just need to share the love He gave us to others and surrender our lives to Him. Yes, I maybe pathetic but probably love makes me more emotional. No one could ever understand me but the Lord and I don’t care for this is what I am.

Isabel! Who Is She?

Isabel Lynn Coupland is her name. She is a Filipino-American, born in Niles, Ohio on March 20, 2000. She was diagnosed with Neuroblastoma stage IV on May 7, 2004.

One evening while waiting for a member to pop-up on NetAgent, (still on AOL that time) Sak was viewing a site and it got my attention. I asked Sak who’s blog it is. Sak and I love reading blogs and we have so much fun reading them at work. Sak sent me the site so I read it. My heart broke when I started reading about her. Her mom Luz was the one posting on the site about her. From then on I started praying for her. She’d been part of my daily devotions. I keep on praying and asking the Lord to lay His hands upon her and receive healing from Him. I keep on claiming that she will be healed. I am doing that for a year now. I’ve sent her a card and her mom sent me a personal e-mail to thank me for it. We still communicate via e-mail. I’m always telling Luz to be strong and I am always praying for Isabel and for her as well. Isabel is going through chemo-therapy. I know it wasn’t that easy. She’s just 5 years old, my tears keep on falling everytime I think of her specially when I pray for her. She is too young to die. She’s a strong little girl though and very pretty. She is cheerful and playful. We are not related but I’ve learned to love her more and more everyday. If I will be given a chance to see her, I will definitely grab it. She got a very special place here in my heart. I will continue praying for her and I hope whoever read this will help me pray for her. She needs prayers and I know prayers can move mountains. I wish I could hug and kiss her. She is really special to me just like my own daughter. May the good Lord strengthen her for every therapy she’s going through. May she receive healing from the Lord. And may her family hold on to their faith. Please help me pray for Isabel and her family and help me claim healing for her.

To know more about her, please visit her blog: Isabel’s Journey

Pictures:

before the diagnosis

Isabel and her older sister Lailanie


pretending she's sleeping


cutie little princess


biking with a friend


so pretty little girls


first day at school


with her sister and friend


boating at the park


really beautiful


wearing her new wig


isn't she beautiful


showing her new disney shirt

An E-mail From My Friend and Sister In Christ (Aby Gonzales)

We had a dinner meeting last night and I slept really late because I read my Bible and my other book. I woke up at 8am but I am too lazy to get up I still want to sleep so I told the Lord “30 minutes more Lord.” It’s 8:30 but I really don’t want to get up so I said “Lord I don’t wanna go to work today. I’m sorry. I’ll just rest here since we don’t get our salary.” But the Lord wants me to go here in the office. Then Rodel knocked at my door to wake me up. So I woke up at 9am then greeted the Lord Good Morning. Then told Him, “I think you really want me to go to the office. What’s waiting for me in the office Lord? Oh I think I need to find that out so I will go as you are telling me to.” I took a bath so fast because it’s really late because I supposed to be at work by 8:30 and it was really cold though we have heater in the apartment. It’s 16°C here right now, so cold. When I get dressed, I thank Rodel for waking me up said goodbye and I rushed to the office. Upon turning my computer on, Nuriku is there (that is my e-mail notifier). I got 2 new messages from Jay Sawal and Aby Gonzales. I immediately opened Aby’s mail because I am so excited to hear from her.

Here is the e-mail:

"Hi sis! Kmusta naka rugu ken? I hope you’ve adjusted already king environment, work and people tho balu ku rugu magkasakit ka…and syempre, homesick.

Ika mi din keni makanyan. Maybe lagi tya a-miss what we’ve been used to especially being with our lovedones and friends. Pasensya na I cannot regularly keep up with your mails. Ngeni ku pa mu mekapagreply.

We’re terribly busy now. Full blast in training mi 3x a week because we’ve lotsa catching up to do. Dakal kami kanu dapat pamung abalu in preparation for the field work. Ali kami pa migvisit king field, sis. Maybe early next year, we’ll have our first team mission trip. Y Dhines, she had experiences of short mission trips king Pinas pero yaku ali ku pa kaya pin somehow excited din and afraid.

Know what sis? This training, this great opportunity to be part of this training, really changed my life – a total turn. Dkal enlightening experiences, sis especially when I get to experience the Lord’s work in my life. It was very painful, sis, kasi HE showed me my true self – a wretched one that is. It all started there…and it was really painful coz’ I have to let go of many many things including my right to myself for the love for the Lord…hayyyy sis…hope I could share all.

I am so grateful for this second chance a-binye nang Lord kaku to fix this life – and not just fix – but He changed it. He is shaping me to become the person He wants me to be. Out of my sinfulness, sis, He still loved me and patiently waited for me. =) That’s why am giving this life for His disposal, sis. Whatever He wants me to do for the coming days, I’ll do. =) All His...=)

Can’t help falling in-love…anapen nitang song…ihihihi…=)

Mingat ka lagi ken ne, sis…and don’t fall in love in the world, alright? =) Keep close to the Lord…=) mmmwahhh!"

Aby S. Gonzales

Upon reading the e-mail, my soul was lifted. Suddenly, I felt pain. I am so happy to hear that Dhines and Aby are doing great and enjoying their missions but part of me was hurt because I really want to join them. I also want to do missions and I am hungry for the words of God. I have cried one night just this week because I was so confuse for one thing about the Lord. I cried so hard and ask Him to help me understand His existence, His power and His whole being. I really want to know more about Him so that I will be well-equipped for my ministry.

I really don't know what to feel because right now I can't give up my goals for my family because I love them so much and I need to support them. Out of the pain that I can't take anymore, I was thinking to whom I could share this and ask for advice. I prayed and then Jhay came to my mind. I know he can help me and enlighten me with this things. So I sent him a message via text.

Here is our conversation:

Gayle

bro, wish i could talk to you.. i am so sad right now.. the pain is tormenting me.. i received an e-mail from my sis aby gonzales.. know her diba? sobrang mekapakyak ku kaya bisa kuring magmission like them really pero ekulapa alakwan family ku.. i need to support them coz if i won't no one would.. my family needs me..part of me bisa kung magfulltime keng pamagserve ku kaya kaso ng kasakit kasi ekula alakwan family ku talaga.. manasakit ku.. Lord knows how much i love Him and i love my family so much too.. i keep on asking for His forgiveness for loving and caring for my family so much.. bro, honestly eku balu ng gawan ku.. i need your advice i don't know what's His plan for me.. mali ba ing gagawa kung paralan para keng pamilya ku? kaluguran kulang sobra pero syempre i love the Lord more than anything.. pero ekula alakwan reng pamilya ku talaga.. magkasakit ku.. ekuna balu ng isipan ku.. gawan ku ngan bro for my family..hay dear kasakit.

(in short: i also want to join missions but right now i can't give my full time to the Lord because i need to work for my family. i really want to serve Him but my family needs me and it hurts me because i can not give Him all. i love my family so much and i really can't afford to lose them but i love the Lord more than anything)

Jhay

missions doesn't measure your passion for the ministry, there are other things to make your own mission.. nanu ba talaga wari ing panagalan mu ketang abasa mung e-mail, the enjoyment or the need to do the great commission? and things like that.. all your works and the Lord are not in vain.. Jesus has prepared much greater missions ahead of you. God bless.. it's not a matter of who you love or who you value, but it's a matter of doing what is to be done, and your family needs you.. you can have your mission inside your family.. wait for the Lord, pray!

Gayle

ing tutu kasi i don't know if loving my family so much is a sin.. i really love them so much and i can't afford to lose them.. i will do everything watever it takes to give them what they need.. misan papagal kung mimisip paralan ng gawan ku para asuportan kula.. matwa ne y ma ku bro, i want to give back wat she gave to me, sobrang pamag-ingat ng ma ku, manasakit ku kasi ekuna abye kang tatang ku ing buri kung ibye kaya kasi ala ne.. y wali ku pa eke apaburen kahit tin neng asawa.. reng pawnaka ku kailangan daku.. meblessed ku ketang e-mail ng aby meinggit ku karela.it makes me more hungry to know more about Him. nakung karakal kukutang about kaya na eku balung sagutan pati keng papamasa kung bible pati kareng sisend dang message kaku malilitu ku.. pero siguro pin datang yarin ing time ku.. i need to start with my family you are right good thing y ma ku mibalik ne..kaya siguro paulyan na nakung Lord.. last part ning e-mail ng aby "Mingat ka lagi ken ne, sis…and don't fall in love in the world, alright? =) Keep close to the Lord…=) mmmwahhh!" balu mu bro, ing pagpray ku ngeni buri ku talaga kahit magwork ku tin kung time keng pamagserve ku kaya bisa ku talagang magserve, dakal kupa dapat abalu about kaya..

Gayle

"Know what sis? This training, this great opportunity to be part of this training, really changed my life - a total turn. Dkal enlightening experiences, sis especially when I get to experience the Lord's work in my life. It was very painful, sis, kasi HE showed me my true self - a wretched one that is. It all started there…and it was really painful coz' I have to let go of many many things including my right to myself for the love for the Lord…hayyyy sis…hope I could share all. " keni meguilty ku kasi i can't give up my dreams for my family meinggit ku kasi ila agive up da ngan..it hurts!

Jhay

Jeremiah 29:11.. for all things work together for good to them who love God! God is preparing you for a good battle, He's equipping you now.. that when the right time comes, you'll be victorious!

Gayle

tnx bro! tnx for listening and for enlightening me.. you've been a true blessing from God.. i am ok now tnx to you and to the Lord.. i am so happy for the second chance God gave me.. eka magbayu ne.. i am praying for that always.. ingat lagi.. i will always remember the things you told me.. God bless you n your family!

Jhay

di lahat ng naging effective sa isang tao ay applicaple sa iba, the others might be dead on the first bullet, but you might not.

Gayle

wow so deep.. di ko madig hehe.. yeah bro, now i know that i have a different calling and different way on serving Him.. thanks for letting me realized that.. i just need to trust Him right? whatever His will 4 me I am now ready to follow.. He knows what's best for me.. im holdin on to my faith and to His promises! Tnx!

I felt fine and relieved after that. Now I know that even if I can’t give Him my full time. What is important is what I can do for Him even just simple act of goodness and kindness to my family and others. I can serve Him even with my simple ways. Jhay is right, I can have my own mission within my family. I will start that mission when I get back home. I will start ministering to my family. Most of us were Christians and I am glad my mom is active on her service. I want our whole family to be Christians and serve the Lord. I want to serve the Lord with them. When I accomplished that, my next mission is to win my friends’ souls and then win more souls and I will be victorious. I really thank Jhay for helping me and for enlightening me. God is truly great and He is a forgiving God. I thank Him for the second chance He gave me. I’m lost and He found me. As what I told Aby on my reply, we feel the same. I keep falling in love with the Lord. Oh I can’t thank Him enough for all the things He’d done and keep on doing and for giving me amazing friends like Aby, Dhines, and Jhay. They are truly blessings to me. My angels that was sent from above. Three of my inspirations. These guys help me to hold on to my faith and keep me going. I love these guys so much and I am so proud of them. I am praying that I can have a mission with them. And I am praying always that the Lord will bless them always, strengthen them and help them to win more souls and succeed on their ministry and missions. I am so excited to be with them and share my experiences and hear theirs. And I am more excited to go home and see my family and start my mission.

My Deepest Gratitude

Saturday 1am, I've watched the Hillsong's concert held last February 27, 2005. I was overwhelmed and touched with the huge crowd. Seeing this huge crowd jumping, raising hands, crying while praising the Lord is one of the happiest moments of my life. I am praying that I could be in Australia even just for a day just to attend Hillsong Church's service. I want to hear their bands play and sing live. I am so blessed seeing the talents of this people and they let their talents be used for the glory of the Lord. Wishing I have the same talent but I am still grateful because I can dance for His glory. Praising and serving the Lord with my family and my future partner also came into my mind that makes me more eager to go home. There is nothing happier than being with your family and your partner and praising and serving the Lord with them. Though having a boyfriend is not yet on my priorities right now, I am always praying that the Lord will give me a Christian partner. A guy that will work and serve the Lord with me. And while listening to their songs, few words are also coming from my mind and it reminds of the poem that I promised the Lord. When I composed my poem Just A Friend, I told the Lord that I will make one for Him and that is a promise. I did not forget but I have so much to tell Him and I know words are not enough for all the things He gave me and I want it to be the most beautiful poem I could compose because it is for Him and I want it to be from the bottom and deepest part of my heart and soul.The concert was through at 3am so I prayed and told the Lord I will start drafting as soon as I wake up. I started writing 2 stanzas but my chinese friend came and I promised her for a sleep over on her apartment. She really wanted me to stay with her so I did and I stayed there till our Sunday service. So as soon as I get here at work, I started writing so here is the poem. I don't have the good choice of words but the poem came from my heart and soul.

My Deepest Gratitude
Gayle Galang
I have turned away from You many times before
But You keep on knocking my door over and over
All You want is to be remembered and make my day brighter
Never stopped pleasing me that You're a great comforter
You've given me wonderful, loving friends and family
You meet all my needs just to make me really happy
You are always watching over me to ensure of my safety
But what You see in me is fear and my hear is weary
From how many times did I break Your heart
Is how many times You forgive me everytime I ask
So seldom You hear me pray and seek for Your comfort
But You never ceased to love me and give me support
You've been there for me and blessed me everyday
You saturate my soul and my fears You cast away
You lift me up and keep showing me the way
You keep on giving but You didn't ask me to repay
You always heal my heart everytime it breaks
You're mending it each time it was hurt and bleeds
You always listen whenever my soul cries
You ease the pain for every sorrow it utters
You gave Your only Son just to redeem me
He took the punishment to give me life and set me free
He bears the pain instead of deciding to flee
He endures the tortures and chose to die for me
How cruel I am to forget all the things You and Jesus done
Everytime I fail my hope and faith will also be gone
Keep on hurting You and treated You as no one
I believe and praise myself instead of You I should enthrone
Now I've realized that I am blessed for having You
I have proven that my Creator and His love is true
Knowing You're there, I am sure my life has a better value
Your loving kindness and forgiveness lifted me out of the blue
I am sorry for all the things I have done wrong
Forgive me for all the blame I put in You for so long
I'll never be the same again I swear I'll be strong
Never let the enemy steal me again because to You I belong
I can't thank You enough for being an amazing Father
For fixing my broken heart and putting the pieces back together
For giving me unconditional love and for Your mercy that endures forever
For keeping me safe al the time and for being my shelter
Now that I have You, I am no longer insecure
Because I know in You alone my future is secure
You sanctified my heart and cleansed it from being impure
I will be loved forever and never be alone that's for sure
You are my Lord, my Saviour, my King, my Life, and my God Almighty
You're the best thing that had happened to me, a Father full of mercy
For all the things You have done, You deserve all the glory
All the praises, all honors, all worships You are worthy
Draw me closer to You and promise You'll never let me go
My flesh may fail me but I will keep coming back to You
I will forever praise and thank You no matter what I'll do
I trust and adore You and to You I will always look up to
I love You more than anything else in this world
I will never ever trade You for silver or for gold
My faith in You and Your promises I will hold
Promise to obey You always and I will never be cold
Forever I will serve You with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength
I love You from the depths of my soul and love You more than my breath
I will be forever grateful and do Your will here on earth
I will not stop praising, loving You and forever I'll live by faith
Nothing compares to You and to the love You gave
I am overwhelmed with all the blessings I have
What is more beautiful and greater than knowing that I am save
Let me offer You my life as an expression of my deepest gratitude